Waiting for X-Games.

This Sox game just isn't exciting, and the golf is...well...golf. X Games at three, Phillies at four.

Bye Merkin!

Pubic wig, we were looking for pubic wig. Baldelli in for Drew after Big Papi walks in a run to make it 5-0. Can the Orioles play the Nationals in a Caribbean World Series style event, best out of 11 games, and whoever loses can be eliminated from professional baseball competition forever?

Eye of the Tiger...

Tiger been roaring since Friday and just missed a putt for birdie. I'm gonna buy a red polo, and then wear it to normal Sunday events and celebrate like crazy. I'm gonna pray like a motherfucker at church and do the Tiger fist pump when God answers my prayers of winning the lottery. THIS JUST IN: Tiger Woods just killed a spectator with an errand 3-wood shot into the gallery.

Did he say what I think he said?

Is the Orioles starter named Merkin? We all know what a merkin is, right?

4-spot.

Why does Dave Roberts sound like the kids who announce the lineup sometimes? He just sped through the Sox D like he had never read the names before. Good thing he saved the Red Sox in 04. I'll give him a pass for that...he needs practice in the booth though. Where's Remy? Is he still laid up? Why can't he do what Tommy Heinsohn does? That guy will NOT travel anywhere but the Garden. Remy should have an apartment at Fenway. Doesn't Pesky live there? They could be roommates...I smell a sitcom! Sox are up 4-0!

Is it football season yet??

Getting pretty bored with the usual Sunday lineup of sports. It's always golf and baseball. Another major sport needs to start happening A S A P. Hell, I would even settle for hockey. I wake up this morning and fucking swimming is on?? NO PHELPS! Can anyone tell me that they would nail Dara Torres? I might. Papi up with bases loaded as the Sox threaten early. I'm conflicted about how I feel about him...hmmmmmmm.

I get bored easy.

Farewell for the afternoon, gang. Keep with updates at the official twitter.

Really?

I JUST SAW ALFONSO RIBEIRO!!!!! HE DID NOT DO THE CARLTON DANCE!!! MY LIFE IS NOT COMPLETE!!!! Saw him during the pro-am. Not in real life.

Pro-am.

It must be tough to be the announcer for a pro-am golf tournament. First, you announced a golf tournament on a weekend where there was a loaded major, and you weren't invited to announce said major. Secondly, none of the players in this event have anything to play for. Bragging rights? This should be a b-list celebrity only event. We have Jordan, Jerry Rice, and Romo. What if we had Andy Dick, Kathy Griffin, and Skeet Ulrich? Winner can pay their electric bill this month and still have enough left over to make it to their part time job at a supermarket at 6 pm.

Too close...

Would be nice to see some of these games go to extras. Tigers and Yankees are also tied late, heroics are always fun, no matter the team. I wonder if some of the Nats have second jobs. They play like they do baseball part-time.

Action!

Some tense moments around baseball Sunday, Indians/Mariners tied in the eighth, same with Reds/Brewers, and as far as the Nationals...wellllllll...down by nine. It aint over till its over, right? It's July, Washington. Sorry, but it's over.

What's Happ-nin?

J.A. Happ just weaseled his way out of a sick bases loaded no out jam in an afternoon where nothing is going right for the Marlins. Couple of tight games going on right now. Phils are DESTINED for the World Series. Who can stop them in 5/7 games? Maybe the Cards? Not when we get Halladay. In an absolutely SHOCKING turn of events, the USA/Canada women's soccer game is tied at zero. UN-FUCKING-REAL.

Imagine that.

The Marlins (who I didn't think were going to be around right now, see: my last post) are apparently getting a new stadium. Apparently, according to the announcers, in centerfield they are going to have what's supposed to look like a beach, except without the sand. Wait...really? Anyway, their stadium looks to be about 30 percent filled right now (and like 50 percent of that is Phils Phans). Where are they getting this money? Are their owners knocking off retirees' bingo games and stealing SS checks?

Cro-magnon.

If you had told me that the GEICO cavemen and lizard would still be around after all these years, I would have told you to go fuck your mother. The same statement applies for the following things/people: both pro Florida baseball teams, the MLS, the WNBA, Jamie Moyer, Tom Watson, Garfield movies, Glenn Beck, Tom Cruise, my job at Lucky Strike. Oh wait, that job isn't around anymore? Well...go fuck your mother.